Remembering Yourself this Holiday Season

I hear way too much talk about "surviving the holidays" these days. From the financial stress presents put on families to the schedule takeover by holiday parties, people can go a little crazy this time of year.
When I was younger, I would look forward to November and December all year round, waiting for the lights, the carols and the holiday festivities. I had that warm, fuzzy feeling from October 31st to January 1st and I was unstoppable. This girl would spend hours drafting and decorating her Christmas list and I'd fall asleep to the Raffi Christmas album every night. "Douglas Mountain" was my sleepy time jam!

It often seems the Holiday spirit inversely relates to someone's age and I am just not OK with this. That little kid inside of me still exists and she wants to live it up this holiday season. Don't you?
So, how can I do this?
My observations tell me that people lose the holiday spirit when things get too crazy and they have nothing left to give. They've spent all their time, energy and money on everyone else and they are completely tapped out. They're fresh out of patience for [insert annoying family member here] and cannot handle another [insert holiday-themed dessert here].
Does this sound familiar?

A Selfish Proposition

I'm proposing something different this holiday season: a list of ways to be a little more selfish. Now, don't get me wrong, I wholeheartedly believe the holiday season is about giving and thinking of others BUT I believe that can only be done out of a heart that is well cared for itself. When we give on repeat and take no time to replenish ourselves, Ebenezer Scrooge appears. And yes, I believe that's the clinical name for it. Here are three ways you can remember yourself this holiday season:

1. Take scheduled time for gratitude. Literally put it in your planner. Whether it's 5 minute every morning sitting in silence reflecting on all you love or a special two-hour gratitude-focused yoga intensive with yours truly at 3 Bridges Yoga (shameless plug), scheduling a time to sit with your gratitude will do wonders for your perspective. Take the time to dust off and clean those rose-colored glasses of yours.
2. Say "no" to some things. Does it overwhelm you to spend Christmas Day in a car going to see all 84723982 of your relatives? Lay the hammer down and only see a few of them. Does your office holiday party make you feel all sorts of awkward and spent at the end of the night? RSVP no. Don't have time to make cookies for a cookie swap? Then just don't do it. Outsource that sh*t to someone who does it better, like a local bakery (I won't tell if you won't). Spending too much money on gifts? Stop it. Do a Pollyanna swap with your family rather than getting each person a gift and try to tone down the "stuff". If you're able to read this blog, chances are you have too much of it anyway.
3. Take care of your body. Our bodies are our mediators with the world around us. Without them, we can't participate in our own lives. Take the time to care for your body this holiday season. Whether that's with daily exercise or healthy foods, your body needs and deserves it. Then, when events you really love come about, you can participate in all the special parts of it with abandon. Wine, I'm looking at you!

What I'm trying to say is that the holidays are as joy-filled as you make them. If you're feeling more like a Grinch than Buddy the Elf this year, be sure that you're getting what you need. Chances are, you're not. And chances are, if you do, you might notice a whole shift in perspective. 

The Sisterhood of Motherhood

My daughter screams upstairs. I'm making her put on pants...AGAIN. It may be 50 degrees outside but sister does not want pants and she is going to let everyone in a 3 block radius know. I'm downstairs with the nice child, my 20 month-old, who hasn't learned yet how to throw a really good tantrum. I treasure these last meltdown-free months.

This is not a going "my kids are so awful but they're really actually wonderful and I need to treasure every moment" post. It's just not. There are plenty of amazing posts out there but I just didn't feel like writing one today.

This is a post to remind you (to remind ME) that we are not alone in this. That, when your child is screaming, melting down, throwing stuff and overall just being an unrecognizable maniac, you are not alone.


I see you struggle with what to do next. Do you pick the fight? Do you give in? Do you walk away and give space or do you accompany the maniac in the tantrum? I SEE YOU.

I hear you use your most patient tone. I hear you lose it and yell. I hear you bargain, plead and cajole. I hear you whisper words of love and encouragement. I HEAR YOU.

I feel your heart break for your child's pain. Whether it's about something significant (but I really WANTED to see that friend) or something ridiculous (I said I wanted the BLUE underwear!), I feel your frustration and your sadness as you watch your child unravel. I FEEL YOU.

The truth is, we've all been there. Maybe some of our kids are more laid back than others (if this is you, can your kid talk to my kid, please?) but we've all been in the thick of it. We know the moment will pass but that does not take away from the suckiness (yes, I'm really that eloquent today) of it.

Know you are not alone. This motherhood we live in? Yeah, it's a sisterhood. That means that, at any point in time, if we are honest and forthright, we can share and receive affirmation from fellow mothers around us. The mud you might be in now and the mud you may be in later is familiar mud to the Sisterhood. We've been there, we KNOW how sticky it can get.

So reach out. Be honest. If you're in a good space, CELEBRATE IT! If you're struggling, LET THE SISTERHOOD KNOW.

We moms need to stick together. Our job is critical and our cargo is precious.

In the meantime, there is wine. There are bubble baths. There is laughter (these kids are FUNNY so do yourself a favor and laugh at them...and with them, I guess that's nicer, right?).

And there is the Sisterhood.

It's the Remix to Transition . . .

Before you read what will be an amazing post, look to your right. You see that blue box telling you that you can help people by providing clean drinking water? Put in your email address and help P&G provide up to 100,000 days of clean drinking water. I promise you will not be inundated with emails from P&G. Do it . . . or else.


We. Are. Moving. Finally.

Yes, now that blurb at the top of this page that describes me as someone who is "about to make a move" is legit. I am really, friends, about to make a move. We have set our sights on Portsmouth, New Hampshire and should be there after Christmas to ring in the new year, Granite State style.

What's that, you say? You've never been to New Hampshire? Well, watch this educational video and learn. I promise it will be illuminating.


So, folks, this is where I am moving. It's just like Old Hampshire, but it's new. This means, I am officially in a period of transition. We need to figure out how we're moving our stuff across the country, how our little Satan (our cat) is getting across the country and, of course, where we'll live when we make it there.

Overall, I like change. Now, I didn't say I was good at change, just that I liked it. Call it my ADD but I love switching things up because it keeps things fresh and exciting. Take my shampoo, for instance. I rotate through shampoo so my hair doesn't get bored or worse, take the hair products for granted (I do buy Aveda, after all- that s#!t's expensive).

My husband complains about the volume of products but his luscious locks totally thank me.

I have loved pretty much every minute I've spent here in SF. So, to show my appreciation, I've made a list of the things I will miss most about this great city (you know I love lists).

1. Wine Country. Really, this is self explanatory. Not since football games at Boston College was it appropriate to drink before noon. Thank you, Sonoma, for making inappropriateness acceptable again.
2. Food. Yes, I know there is food where I am going but not like this. From sandwiches at Ike's to Tsunami sushi, I will miss the smorgasbord of opportunities to stuff my face. I feel like like Templeton from Charlotte's Web when he's at the fair! So many things to choose from I might not get home because my tummy is so full!
3. People of Color. Yes, I feel I have to say "goodbye" to diversity as I am moving to New Hampshire where I will be with, pretty much, only other white people. I am sad about this because I know diversity makes us better and well, I need all the help I can get!
4. Being Outside . . . all year. I am moving to a place where it gets very cold and I'm kind of in denial about that. I don't really want to talk about it so . . . moving on!
5. My friends. Yes- I have friends in NH. Fabulous ones that I can't wait to be near. But, I also have fabulous friends here that I don't want to leave. When I finally master teleportation and/or apparition this long distance will not be a problem. If you don't know what apparition is, then I feel sorry for you but you can look it up here. 

I hope that, in the next few weeks, I take the time to reflect on what this place has meant for us. To often, we jump from one thing to another and never take a moment to soak it all in-- sometimes, we are really bad sponges. I wish, for myself and my husband, that we will internalize all of the wonderful things we've had and allow them to make us better and stronger. Then, we'll share that wealth with New Hampshire and, all I have to say is: New Hampshire, you're welcome.